I grew up in a Christian family and I was always taught that God is a loving God and that He cares and loves us. Indeed He is a good God and He cares about everything in our lives. Recently, I received a great birthday gift from God and I would like to share it with you.
When I first heard Susan Dunn shared about her love story and of how she met Pastor Derek, I was very touched. Susan shared that God spoke to her about the man she would marry. God gave her a verse out of Proverbs 31 and in verse 23, it says, Her husband is known in the gates, When he sits among the elders of the land. And indeed Pastor Derek is a man after God’s heart and well-respected within the church community.
Susan’s testimony inspired me. I had a desire, I told Jesus that I want to have a sweet and beautiful testimony in the area of my relationship too. I prayed to God that may my marriage glorify Jesus, and let it be a great testimony which I can encourage fellow Christian women.
On 21 August 2011, I was feeling very sad and depressed as it has almost been a year since I ended a 7-year relationship. That Sunday, I was struggling. I felt emotionally wounded and drained, I was disappointed and frustrated with myself. By His grace, I found my way to church and as I enter His presence, I cried out to God. Then I felt Holy Spirit asked me if am I willing to put Him first in my life?
I felt that God was telling me if I were to put Him first in my life, He will bless me. I cried and I responded, I took out my handphone, this was what I recorded down in my handphone: I PUT MY GOD FIRST IN MY LIFE, I BELIEVE NEXT YEAR BY THIS TIME ,I WILL REJOICE, I WILL BE ATTACHED.
I made a vow; that from 21.08.2011 onwards, for a year, I will be not involved in any romantic relationship. I made a faith proclamation that God will prepare someone great for me and by August 2012 I will be attached!!
Life went on. It was hard but I continued to trust in God, allowed God to heal my wounds, continued to love God as I surrounded myself with godly women who could look out for me. I remembered one of the most important part of my healing journey was when Susan invited me to her office and prayed with me. Due to the sin I commited in my previous relationship, there was guilt and shame within me and I could not forgive myself. Susan prayed over me and broke the soul tie in the name of Jesus, the soul tie was a result from sexual intimacy with that man. That day, I was brought before the Lord and I forgave the guy and I forgave myself just as God had forgiven me. Through it, I became set free and emotionally whole again. I am a new creation before the Lord.
In February 2012, I resigned from my work as a flight attendant and enrolled myself into City Harvest Church’s School of Theology. Some time in March 2012, while I was in my room reading the Book of Matthew from the Bible, I was moved by the Holy Spirit to start praying and as I prayed, the Holy Spirit led me to pray for my husband. I was puzzled and ask the Holy Spirit how am I supposed to pray for a husband when I am still on a single-hood vow and besides, I did not know how to pray such a prayer!
I clearly heard the Holy Spirit said, “Open up your eyes and read the Bible”. As I opened up my eyes, I was shocked to see that my bible was now at the Book of Titus and not the gospel of Matthew where I had earlier left off.
I picked up the bible and Titus 1:8-9 caught my eye and it was magnified and I could see the words clearly.
Titus 1:8-9 reads,”Rather, he must be hospitable, one who loves what is good, who is self-controlled, upright, holy and disciplined. He must hold firmly to the trustworthy message as it has been taught, so that he can encourage others by sound doctrine and refute those who oppose it.”
This verse describes the characteristics of a Christian man. I began to weep before the Lord as I knew that God was giving me a guideline on the type of husband I would have. I kept this in my heart and did not share it with anybody except my best friend and prayer partner, Amanda Siew.
After that encounter, nothing happened for the next few months. But I was proclaiming and praying for the “unknown” guy. In the month of June 2012, out of the blue, there were few guys who asked me out, however, as I was still in my single-hood vow and I wanted to honor God, I did not go out with any of them.
However, one of the guys did caught my attention but I did not do anything except commit it in prayer to God. I was unsure on how to recognize if this guy was the man that God had for me. So I told the Lord, if he is the right guy, let him come back with the verse of Titus 1:8-9 just as You have spoken.
Saying such a prayer made no logical sense, but I had the peace of God when I made such request. I believe nothing is impossible with God.
And interestingly, on 10th of August, which was my birthday, the man who had caught my attention previously came up and profess his interest in me. I was surprised and I took up the courage and told him of the prayer request I had made to the Lord about the right guy in my life.
I asked if he would like to take up the challenge to pray and seek God and if he is the one God has prepared for me, then God will speak to him and give him the bible verse that I have held on to. He agreed and was given 48 hrs to pray and to seek God for that verse. After putting down the phone, I knew in my heart he will get the verse right.
Within 24 hours, he sent me a message with the verse Titus 1:7-9. I did not tell him which book or which chapter the verses were from. The only clues I gave him was that the verses are found in the New Testament and it is about characteristics of a man. And out of 27 books in the New Testament, and by the leading of the Holy Spirit, he actually found the right verse!
He shared with me that the Holy Spirit told him to look into the book of Titus and after much prayer and reading, he was led to those few verses. Though he does not yet have all of the qualities listed in Titus 1:8-9, he certainly has some and he is still learning and growing to be more Christ-like. Today, I am happily engaged to Kevin Shen.
Susan, I want to thank God for this testimony. I can’t thank God enough. My ultimate motive is to be able to tell all the ladies who are struggling in relationships, in looking for a partner, that God cares about our marriage, our happiness. I was once struggling badly too. Susan, thank you for living out your life in such a wonderful way. It was you who inspired me that against the odd ratio, remember you said back then in CHC the ratio of men to women was very low yet nevertheless God provided a great and honourable husband for you.
No matter how bad the situation may be or how dark and cold it feels like. Just trust that the Almighty God cares for us and He loves us.