|Shortly after I was born, my mom decided to abandon me and she left me at the doorstep of my dad’s home. While growing up as a child, I struggled with many insecurities and low self-esteem. I could not get along with my relatives and had problems trusting others as they had mistreated me.
Without family love and a deep sense of guilt and shame, I entered my teenage years seeking love in all the wrong places. I started dating when I was just 13 years old. Throughout my teenage years, I was constantly running away from home and was embroiled into a whirlwind of smoking, drinking, drug abuse, gang fights and even being hauled up to the police station.
Eventually, I got married when I was 21 years old because of a pregnancy. Shortly after I gave birth to my daughter, Joey.
However, the marriage did not work out because there was no true love between us.
I felt that my life was falling apart. Being a single mother with little financial ability and a broken heart, I was depressed and suicidal.
In 2004, my friend invited me to City Harvest Church. And through the teachings of the Word of God and the support from my friends, I went through counseling and bible study lessons and learned to receive forgiveness from God and also to forgive those who have hurt me. I was also water baptized in the same year.
God also provided for Joey and I financially by allowing me to work at an international American company even though I was only a N-level graduate.
However, there was a part of me that still could not trust people. I did not believe in human love. I took a vow to stay single and focus on serving God and taking care of my daughter. I wanted to make God my everything and He alone is enough for me. I did not want to be involved in a relationship with another man because I was afraid of being hurt and disappointed.
But God’s love and faithfulness towards me is so great. In 2006, I was attending Pastor Kong’s marriage seminar in church when God revealed to me that I had locked my heart up so tightly that it has hardened. I decided to surrender to God and asked Him to unlock my heart of stone and turn into a heart of flesh. I wanted to be able to love others just as He loves.
Not only did God unlocked my heart, He also provided for me. In the years that I have been working in my company, a fellow senior colleague by the name of Matthew Cheetham has been supportive and caring towards me. He is a true gentleman but I did not reciprocate his kindness towards me except to be professional and cordial towards him at work. He was very sincere towards me but I did not respond because my heart was shielded behind a wall to protect myself.
After I surrendered my heart to God, I was able to accept Matthew’s friendship that eventually brought us into a dating relationship. He accepted Joey and I into his life with no conditions just as Christ loved us without conditions. He even asked Joey if he could date me!
Matthew is a wonderful man of God. He is the rock that God has provided for me to give me stability and security. Despite my tumultuous growing up years and messed-up relationships, God provided a second and better future for me.
Matthew and I got married on 7 July 2007 and this time, it was in accordance to the word of God and we entered into a covenant of Christian marriage. I now have a beautiful family – three children – Joey, Evie and Jackson and together with Matthew, we are making the best out of what God has given to us.