|I was blessed with a good life in the first quarter of my life. Whatever I wanted, such as property, car, luxurious bags, academic awards or winning titles in beauty pageants, I had it.
I felt that there was no need to know God as I could handle life myself. However, given the so-called blessed life, I was feeling empty on the inside. After each achievement, I need to find something new to achieve again and again to fill up this void.
At the age of 25, a friend invited me to church and I finally gave my heart to Jesus. I realized the truth that only He alone can fill the emptiness in my heart! I began to grow in the Lord and joined the Aircrew Fellowship led by Susan Dunn. Though I know God, my personality did not change much. I was still striving in life and doing things to make myself feel good.
The only difference was, I did God’s work and got actively involved in ministry instead of achieving worldly recognition. I was on fire for God and served extremely hard. As a young Christian, I thought that was the only way to grow. I did not realize this was a pitfall until Susan sharply pointed out my weakness.
Under her discipleship, I learnt the teaching of “Being is more important than doing”. She shared that many Christians fall into the trap of “doing” to either make themselves feel good or have the wrong belief that God will love them more. Without understanding, we could be doing church work carnally. This means that anything done in the natural has no supernatural power.
I realized that I was “doing” to proof my love to people and God, which seems right. However, Susan was sharp to discern my issue of insecurity and low self-worth through my actions. She explained that God loves me too much for me to stay the same. God wants to do a work in me, just like the way an onion is peeled, layer-by-layer.
She helped me to overcome my struggle by urging me to read God’s word consistently, pray often, thirst more for the Holy Spirit and yearn for a deep relationship with Jesus. These should be my priority above all else.
I am in my fifth year as a Christian and I still remembered the word that Susan spoke into my life from Hebrews 4:1 (NLT) “God’s promise of entering his rest still stands, so we ought to tremble with fear that some of you might fail to experience it.”
My spiritual eyes have since been opened to the things of God, and the truth has set me free. Now, I live a happy and fulfilling life because I know who I am in God. I feel secured in God’s love because I know that His love for me is everlasting. I no longer strive to achieve things, but I am learning to obey and honor God in all that I do and gladly entering into the rest He promised.
I am still serving actively in church, but with a renewed mind because I work together with the Holy Spirit, to answer the call of God and enjoy the ministry that flows out of my relationship with Him.
Carpe Diem~ Seize the Day!