All posts filed under: Marriage

For This Cause – 13 Years Of Marriage

This Oct 13 marks the 13th year of my marriage to Derek. Sometimes I am held in awe that it has been that many years when it seems like it was not too long ago that we had gotten married, moved into our very first home and gave birth to Ethan, our first born. 13 years to some may not be a very long time. However, I believe the quality of a union is not measured by the duration but by the depth of the relationship. There is a saying “Life is not measured by its duration but it’s donation”. In the same way, marriage is the bedrock of Christ-centered living only if we intentionally make it to be so. The two shall become one does not simply happen because a husband and wife live together under one roof. Having children sometimes helps in that process. However, that is not to be taken for granted either. Derek had just ended his recent series of sermon on “Being A Pioneer”. In my opinion, this is one …

Christian Marriage – Final Part

Hi everyone! I can’t believe that it’s been more than a month since my last post. I have been traveling a bit and could not settle down to write. Just a summary for those who are new at reading this blog, we have started our 4-part series on Christian Marriage. In our first article in this series, we talked about the Christian marriage being a symbol of Jesus redeeming the world through His ‘marriage’ to the Church and making her one with Him. In the second article, I discussed about how God wants us to adopt a ‘No Longer I’ attitude in our marriages. I also commented that true joy comes from loving someone with liberty. However this must be done in the boundary of God’s word and being guided by the Holy Spirit. My husband, Derek contributed the third article from a man’s perspective. He expounded on what men really want in their wives and that is the companionship of a helper. In other words, a soul mate! Whenever a man leaves his parents …

Christian Marriage – Part 3

What does a man really want from a marriage? This question has been asked throughout the ages by women as well as by men themselves. There have been numerous books, magazines and talk shows that have become popular by trying to answer this. For us to truly begin to understand the answer to this question, we need to go back to the beginning. In the Word of God, we get His perspective on marriage. Genesis 2:18; 21-24 (NLT) 18 Then the LORD God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper who is just right for him.” 21 So the LORD God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep. While the man slept, the LORD God took out one of the man’s ribs and closed up the opening. 22 Then the LORD God made a woman from the rib, and he brought her to the man. 23 “At last!” the man exclaimed. “This one is bone from my bone, and flesh from my flesh! She will be called ‘woman,’ because …

Christian Marriage – Part 2

Christian Marriage – A Woman’s Perspective No Longer I In my last posting, we saw how Christ because of His love for us, “ left” His Father in Heaven so that He could cleave to the Church and became one flesh with her. Now, He is the Head of the Church- His body. Similarly, how can two persons with different attributes and personalities become one flesh? It can only happen when we begin to see Christian Marriage in a difference perspective – God’s perspective! In a Christian Marriage, God expects us to “see” our spouse and ourselves as ONE. This is clearly evident as He specifically instructed men to love their wives as themselves and for the women to see that they respect their husbands. (Eph 5:22~33) He wants us to take on a “no longer I” (Gal 2:20) approach and attitude in our marriages. It is no longer about “Me” but “We and Us”. This does not mean that you lose your individuality and become a person of no preference, opinion or ideas when you get married …

Christian Marriage – Part 1

Till Death Do Us Part Many of you may have watched my wedding video from my last posting. If you listened carefully, you may have noticed that Derek had left out something in his vow; not deliberately but because he was a tad under the weather. This is what was left out in his vow: “all my worldly goods endowed to you” “as long as we both shall live” After the ceremony, I pulled him aside and jokingly asked if he had intentionally left out the two most important statements in a wedding vow – which is all that he has is mine and he will love me no matter who I am and accept me no matter what I did! Of course he denied it vehemently! I saw this joke on the Internet one day…. During the wedding rehearsal, the groom approached the minister with an unusual offer. “Look, I’ll give you $100 if you’ll change the wedding vows. When you get to me and the part where I’m to promise to ‘love, honor …

God Is My Matchmaker – The Prize

My Earthly Prize 14th February 2012 – Valentines’ Day. It is 8am and I have just dropped the kids in school. They were so excited this morning because they had all their gifts and cards ready for their classmates and teachers. Just the night before, while cuddling in bed, Ethan pretended to find a Valentines’ Day card on the bed and passed it to me. Of course, it was from him and in it he wrote: “Dear mom, happy Valentines’ Day! You are my sunshine. From: Ethan”. Sitting here at Starbucks, I cannot help but feel blessed to have them in my life. My thoughts also brought me back to the same Valentines’ Day in 2001. It was at the Meritus Mandarin Singapore Hotel (now known as the Mandarin Orchard Hotel). Derek and I were celebrating my birthday cum Valentine’s Day when in the midst of the dinner, he got down on one knee and asked me to marry him. And of course, I said YES! After knowing Derek for 4 years and dating for …

God Is My Matchmaker – The Preparation (Part 2)

Be the Right Woman Many single women claim that all the good men are taken or they are all married. At the same time, married women complain about how lousy they feel their husbands are. This confirms that there is no such thing as a perfect man. Or maybe there was one… There was a perfect man who met a perfect woman. After a perfect courtship they had a perfect wedding. Their life together was, of course, PERFECT! One snowy, stormy Christmas Eve, this perfect couple was driving along a winding road when they noticed someone at the roadside in distress. Being the perfect couple, they stopped to help. There stood Santa Claus with a huge bundle of toys. Not wanting to disappoint any children on the eve of Christmas, the perfect couple loaded Santa and his toys into their vehicle. Soon they were driving along, delivering the toys. Unfortunately, the driving conditions deteriorated and the perfect couple and Santa Claus had an accident. Only ONE of them survived the accident. Who was the survivor? THE …